I was thinking about the tumble I took this past Friday and how I didn’t simply trip, I face-planted. The Face-Plant is a special kind of trip where, usually, you don’t have time to be shocked, scared, or worried about your safety because it happens so quickly, that you just find yourself face down on the ground. The story goes: My friends and I were coming back from a dated function, and I was enthusiastically telling an (I’m sure) incredibly interesting story, when we all realize the crosswalk countdown is at 4 seconds! My friends who have speed-walked ahead of me break into a jog in order to cross one of the busiest streets in State College. As I try to continue my story, while still crossing the street in time, my right foot lagged a little (i’m going to guess), and it rolled into a donut shape with the rest of my leg, creating a domino affect that left my entire body, face down, in the middle of the intersection….
At this time, the cars are heading toward me at a rapid rate, while my best friend runs back to physically pull my body off the pavement. Meanwhile, I have not been distracted. I am still trying to tell my story, whatever the hell it was, and stress how funny it is. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that, at this point, my story is NOT the funny part of this moment. After the incident, I was thinking about how much funnier a Face-plant is than just a regular trip. Trips are pretty awkward, and are normally followed by an awkward chuckle here and there, but a Face-plant can never be avoided and must be guffawed at (don’t worry, mine definitely was). I also think it’s strange that “Don’t Slip” signs show a person slipping on their cushiony buttocks region:
Like, what is that? I very rarely slip and fall on my butt, and if I do, my body is not harmed in the least. Being at school where snow falls and ice covers everything, I’ve learned that falling on your ass is a normal occurrence, so in addition to my cushiony fall, I barely even notice that I should be embarrassed.
The Face-plant has never, and will never, be that ambiguous. Beware, because although it can serve for a good story, it’s best to wear a helmet.
On a side note: I hope you all enjoy this reenactment of the Aunt Telcia picture. I guess you realize how wonderful your friends are, when they agree to participate in something like this. Thanks guys, sorry i’m so strange.
So… here we go. Can you find Sara?